On Letting Go of Not Knowing

“I don’t know” was once my mantra, chanted in place of “umm”. I convinced myself to give up that habit by telling myself that I should know, that I do know, that it is terrible juju to chant myself knowledgeless. But not-knowing has continued to haunt me. Plague me. And when I finally sat down […]

5 Huge Barriers to Acting on Your Dreams & Practical Ways to Blow Them Up

Going out and doing what it takes to make the life you want a reality is freakishly hard sometimes. It just that acting on your dreams is too important to hide from. Here are the five biggest problems I’ve been clobbered by and ways to bludgeon them back into the night. To do the exercises, […]

Uncertainty, Master Teacher

“If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts; but if he will be content to begin with doubts, he shall end in certainties.” -Francis Bacon, The Advancement of Learning In our society, we are obsessed with answers. Who could blame us – after eighteen years of intensive training in answering questions, […]

Not What You Expect

Lessons in life are almost never what you expect. Kids almost never turn out to be who their parents were prepared for them to be. The disaster in your project is almost never the one of the many you foresaw. The goal you really want to achieve is almost never the one you carefully planned […]

Socially Proven Paralysis

What do employees working in quiet desperation, teenagers with matching clothes, and city murder victims have in common? Their terrible situation is caused by what the writer of Influence, Robert Cialdini calls social proof. It so happens that when people are confused about how to act, they look to how other, similar people act for […]

Of Work and Love: In The Ancestral Mating Ground of Stupid Myths

In life, important goals and emotions are the ancestral mating ground for bull shit. This is why there are so many songs about falling in love, dating, and breaking up, and so few songs about what it is like to wake up next to someone who you have been married to for 30 years. Everyone […]

The Real Source of Mysterious Problems

The hardest thing to confront is the fear you don’t want to think you have. It shows up as a kind of strange malfunction, an avoidance, a misunderstanding. When they translated the Bible into Greek, the world they used for sin was hamartia. It is a term from archery, meaning to miss the mark. The […]

No-Mind: How to Actually Be Yourself

The great thing about commitment is that it makes it really clear to you what you should think about. I committed to writing about how to be yourself, and so I started thinking clearly for once about what it means to be yourself. Here’s How to Be Yourself Don’t try. That’s it. This is one […]

Don’t Do the 10 Steps to Sure Success

Yesterday I almost registered a company name. While I was reading up on how to register a business name, I started reading all the articles on 30 questions you have to answer before you start a business. I didn’t have the answers, so I chickened out. The point of these articles is to save you […]

My Promise To The World

Dear world, You make my heart race. You make me feel like I’m going to fall. It’s like standing at the railing of a tall building, looking over the edge with the wind in your face, when you feel that thrill in your spine, that urge to jump. I don’t trust myself with you. I’m […]